In two days I’ll be on a plane to Asia and life will never be the same. I’ve been keeping a secret from you guys that I haven’t been able to share until now.
Brad and I have separated. He’s been living in Florida since June and I bought a one way ticket to Bangkok to leave this life behind and start over. It was the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make—one I’ve struggled with for years. But all you saw on this blog was a facade of a seemingly happy, perfect life. And it was, on paper—I had almost everything I’d ever wanted and dreamed about. So why couldn’t I be happy?
I’ve debated how much to open up and share with the world. This is just a DIY blog, everyone only wants to see pretty pictures and tutorials, right? For those of you in that camp, I apologize for the sudden turn of events, and no hard feelings if you want to move on. I have no idea what will become of this blog, because my entire life is up in the air right now. For the very first time I have no plans for the future. I’ll be landing in Bangkok with nothing but a backpack and my camera, no itinerary or familiar faces. Hoping a solo trek across Southeast Asia will allow me to find clarity and discover myself, on my own, without any crutches to fall back on.
A year ago I would have been terrified of the idea. But I’ve been going through a profound metamorphosis for months. The layers of my cocoon have been peeling away and Thailand is the last phase where I can finally break free and spread my wings, seeing the world through completely different eyes. Every fiber of my being is pulling in this direction. I’m not scared at all. This is the new Jenna Sue.
I’ve been journaling and documenting this entire process, feeling compelled to record every thought and emotion. It’s the most defining era in my life and I don’t want to forget a single moment. My goal is to be as raw and honest as possible throughout my backpacking journey while working through this personal transformation and finding real meaning in life. I know there are so many others out there with similar feelings but they’re too afraid/unsure/unaware to voice them… and I truly hope you continue to read this blog as I share more of my story, and find value and inspiration in the path I chose.
You are the designer of your destiny. You are the author. You write the story. The pen is in your hand, and the outcome is whatever you choose.
My next post will be live from Thailand. I hope to have you on board with me and sincerely appreciate every uplifting word and thought sent my way. Here’s to a brave new life…
Amanda says
You are so incredibly brave. I have loved reading about your travels. Thank you for sharing your story!
Sheresa says
Oddly enough, I stumbled upon your blog today never having visited before you started the journey you’re currently on. It’s strange because although I’ve never met you and I doubt we have very much in common I find myself identifying with you on your risk to start a new journey. I hope as you continue on that this adventure gives you new eyes and fresh perspective and brings you peace. Safe travels!
heather says
You go girl! The world is yours for the taking! Life is nothing if not ever changing. Much love to you as you embark on this journey (which I realize you’ve been on for a while now, but I’m late to the news).
HEATHER R says
I am sorry for the loss of your marriage, however, I am completely in awe of your bravery and wish every one of us could be as lucky as you, to go on a soul searching journey after a separation. How amazing this must be, and I can’t wait to read all about it and see the beauty through your eyes….maybe I can make the trek one day!!
ginger says
Hi Jenna,
I knew there was something up and I thought it might be an illness so on one hand I am very very glad that you and family are healthy but on the other I am sorry that your relationship has ended maybe being separated will give each of you a chance to think about it, but thankfully there are no children involved and it may be the best thing for you both, only time will tell. So I applaud you for going it alone, i moved to Hawaii on my own at age 21 and it was the best thing I ever did. I almost didn’t because a friend was supposed to move with me but she backed out and the community colleges in Honolulu did not accept my out of state application. My wise and wonderful mother, when I was starting to give up my dream of moving to Hawaii, told me that I would always regret it and I could aways come back if it didn’t work out, so thankfully I ended up moving to Maui for school and made a life for myself, met my husband and have been here for over 30 years. (I am on Oahu now) I can’t imagine my life if I didn’t make that move. So go for it and may you have a safe and wonderful journey, you have nothing to loose for now and only much to gain. Who knows what the future will hold and you can always return if it doesn’t work out. But I know it will be the best thing for you, take care be safe and if you ever come through Hawaii please don’t hesitate to email. Warmest Aloha, Ginger
jane says
While the end of a marriage is at least tinged with sadness, your positive attitude is amazing. I hope you find what you are looking for. You only have one life. Stay Safe.
Jane
Lindsay says
Hi Jenna,
I’m very sorry for the difficult time you have been going through. You remind me of myself just a few years ago and I totally understand “where” you are. I did the same thing. I felt that life wasn’t worth anything if I couldn’t understand the purpose of us all being here. I needed answers to my existential questions, and I would stop at nothing to find them. Eventually I did find them and it was the greatest gift I could have received. There is a quote that I love:
“Read everything, listen to everyone, believe nothing, until you research it thoroughly for yourself”. It’s definitely worth the journey if you find the Truth in the end but be careful all by yourself. Don’t let your guard down.
You have to take your own path but if I can offer you a few pieces of advice: pray for sincere guidance from your Creator as you search for the Truth, read and study the history of all the main spiritual/religious paths so you can be sure of the Truth when you come across it, do not follow man-made philosophies, don’t judge a religion by some of its followers, demand proof of absolute authenticity of a book of guidance, and do not complete your spiritual journey without profoundly studying Islam, with the help of a devout Muslim (which can sometimes be hard to find).
Good luck to you Jenna and thank you for sharing your wonderful design projects with all of us. It’s been so fun to check in with your blog over the years!
Enjoy the journey 🙂
Jaime says
Jenna-
You are so brave!! Good luck on your next adventure and know that we are behind you!
They say things happen for a reason, you may not know it at the time, but it will come to you. I hope that sentiment resonates with you as you leap into a new life.
Grace says
Jenna,
I have been in your shoes and while I don’t know all your circumstances, being separated or ending a marriage is devastating. My heart hurt for you when I read your post. I truly believe media makes it out to be like it is no big deal and everyone does it, but it is truly a death and it is the process of being ripped from a person you love, but also the death of future dreams and plans that you stored inside of you and didn’t even realize until you see that those plans and dreams may not occur. My heart goes out to you during this time and I will be praying for you. My best advice because I have been in your shoes is to truly grieve the loss and don’t dismiss how hard this is. With social media it appears everyone lives are perfect, but dont pay attention to that, we all go through devastating things in life and you are not alone. Lots of love and blessings.
Sarah @ Life On Virginia Street says
Hugs and prayers for you girl on this new journey! I hope you find peace in your new journey. Looking forward to following along on this chapter in your life.
xoxo
cathy claus says
I am heartbroken over your breakup. Never are they easy nor do you “just get over it”…You are so right…all looks well in pics and on paper. I don’t have a blog of my own but i have been following you for quite some time now. You amazed me with each house transformation, especially the last one === i’m on all social media and sometimes it is a little depressing looking at picture after picture of these people i don’t even know but it looks like they are living a grandeosa perfect life. I’m not naive’- i know NOTHING is perfect but my Heavenly Father and i pray peace and many blessings as you embark on this new exciting journey. i hope you continue to update – it will be refreshing to read another’s BRAVE journey! May God bless y ou abundantly and may you be at peace and are safe every day! Take care of yourself. Be well with your soul : ) ~Cathy please post updates on instagram too!
dawn says
Wishing you every ounce of happiness possible. I ended a 27 year marriage last August, I haven’t looked back. I’m living life with my littles and loving every second. Go find yourself and be, be wahtever you need to be.
xxxx
Chelsea Jean says
Good for you! How very brave too. I am going through something super similar and toying with the idea of leaving life in SF behind for a new adventure in Australia, so I am really excited to follow along with your Asian adventure!! Good luck and love 🙂
FRECKLES CHICK says
Longtime follower here. Thank you for being your usual candid self yet you exude so much grace. Spread your wings & fly, gal. Thailand was where I felt the most peaceful I had been in a very long time. We were there right after the tsunami & the people, who had already suffered so much, were kind & humble & grateful. Wishing you a soulful journey.
xo
Kaye says
I hope you are ok as I’ve heard there has been a bombing in Bangkok. Xx
Nat says
Hoping you aren’t near the bombing in Bangkok. Take care xx