I’ve been meaning to share updates on our progress at the Riverside Retreat, but we’ve been a bit preoccupied with a newborn and trying to figure out our new normal. We’ve hired out some help and have been DIYing the rest, but we are wayyy behind our original schedule to complete this house as priorities have shifted.
I had so much more time and energy when I was 9 months pregnant, ha! I’m trying not to beat myself up about it as I know one day this will all be a distant memory, but it’s always tough when you’re in the thick of renovations with seemingly no end in sight.
Fortunately, things are wrapping up soon with our new master bathroom! Weeks ago I shared our Blue Lagoon Design Plan:
Quick recap—this is a tiny master bathroom we’ve created from scratch by adding walls in an adjacent bathroom and bedroom:
When I say tiny, I mean the smallest room I’ve ever worked with—33 square feet and just large enough for a pedestal sink, toilet and shower. But what it lacks in size, it certainly makes up for in personality!
Before bringing this bathroom to life, first thing was first: building a new closet from scratch:
Followed by a complete remodel of the main bathroom:
Over the summer we made (slow) progress on the new master bathroom, and I’m happy to say we’re nearing the finish line. There are no before photos to share since this room didn’t exist, but here’s Day 1 of demo, opening up the wall in the old bathroom (you can see the master bedroom window on the left):
Here’s the view from inside the bedroom, looking into the open space that would become both bathrooms:
A lot of work needed to be done, including repairing the foundation, replacing joists, running all new plumbing and electric. We basically had to start from scratch. Once all the not-so-fun demo stage was over, it was time to start adding walls! First up was the wall separating the bedroom (you can see the opening for the door on the left and new closet on the right).
Followed by the walls to separate this bathroom from the main bathroom…
We also opted to add a 2’x4′ window to let in some much needed light and prevent this small room from feeling like a closet.
Next came the floors…
A shower curb was constructed and hardi-backer hung…
We ran into a situation with the plumbing for the sink, and our installer decided it would be best to construct a 2×4″ frame rather than break into the block wall to recess it. We opted to limit the bumpout to just behind the vanity, as we couldn’t afford to lose 4″ of wall space in this already cramped bathroom.
Fortunately, it ended up working out quite nicely because it gave me the idea to run a shelf ledge all the way across the back wall for much needed storage.
Our Cloe blue tile covers the wall below the shelf ledge, and continues floor to ceiling on the back wall and around the shower.
Drywall/backer board install is always one of the most exciting parts, when you can finally get a sense of space!
While the size makes it difficult to capture much in one photo, we were pleasantly surprised to find the room didn’t feel as cramped as we’d imagined in person.
The next big milestone: tile! These pebble tiles require some artistic ability to install, as you have to constantly step back and rearrange individual stones to avoid seeing the seams.
Fortunately, grouting does help to minimize the lines and even things out. We used Mapei sanded grout in Alabaster.
Next came the statement-making Cloe tile…
We used the same Alabaster grout here to help blend the tiles a bit.
We also installed the shelf ledge across the vanity wall to provide some counter space. I plan to stain the wood in a light-medium tone (still deciding on the color).
The small pedestal sink ended up being the perfect size, and how bout those lovely swans?!
I’m digging it.
We still need to finish the trim, paint, hang the mirror and light and artwork, install the shower faucet/drains, shower curtain, hooks and accessories.
This room is nearly impossible to photograph even with a wide angle, so you’ll just have to come see it in person 😉 The Cloe tile is absolutely gorgeous in real life—perfectly imperfect with a lovely translucent quality.
I’ll have to share a video tour in my Instagram stories so you can get a better sense of the space once it’s finished. Watch for that in the coming weeks!
Next up is the kitchen…
It’s not looking like much right now, but we’re slowly getting there. I shared the design plans in this post and our progress in this post. Since then we installed the butcher block counters:
And tested out green paint swatches for the lower cabinets.
These were the Valspar test samples I used for the main bathroom since I already had them on hand, and I was most drawn to #3 (Valspar Alpine Top). However, cabinets require special paint and after much research, I opted to use Benjamin Moore’s Advance paint which is made for cabinets. Valspar also has a cabinet enamel which I’ve heard good things about, and I would have gone that route, except they only offer it in a semi-gloss finish. Come on, Valspar! I prefer to use satin, so Benjamin Moore it is.
I went to my local Ben Moore and picked up a sample of their closest color match, Peale Green. It’s the HC-121 swatch on the bottom right.
Here’s Peale Greene painted on the front sample board, next to Valspar’s Alpine Top (#3). It’s a bit more olive and not quite as saturated as Alpine Top, but I don’t mind. I’m not trying to match a specific color exactly, so I’d rather stick with an off-the-shelf color vs trying to custom color match, to keep things simple.
We purchased a paint gun and respiratory mask and have the cabinet doors in the garage, ready to go. There’s a lot of prep work, priming and drying time involved, so it won’t be a quick and easy process, but that’s next on our DIY to-do list.
Last weekend, we ordered a range hood insert and Lucas built a custom vent hood surround (you can see it here, pre-installation):
I opted for a simple square design, but I’ve got something fun and very unique planned for the finishing touch. I’ve never seen it done before and it’s a big experiment, so you’ll have to stay tuned to see what it is 🙂
The box was built out of cabinet grade 3/4″ plywood and 2×4’s, and attached to the studs.
A hole was cut at the bottom for the vent, which was then attached to the plywood. Easiest DIY ever!
I looked everywhere and found this insert to be the most affordable with the best reviews. It can be vented to the outside or recirculated (with a charcoal kit)—we plan to run the vent up to the roof for maximum efficiency.
There’s still a lot that needs to be done as you can see, but just like every messy stage of life… this too shall pass.
Switching gears to a more personal topic now—let’s talk about motherhood and work/life balance. Our Esmé is almost six weeks old and I will say, no one can prepare you for the shift that happens once they place that baby in your arms. Shift doesn’t even describe it—more like a magnitude 10 earthquake that shakes everything to the ground and forces you to rebuild a new life. I expected this, of course, but didn’t quite expect the massive hormone drop in those first weeks and the complete lack of productivity even though I’m awake 20 hours a day.
That second part is what gets to me most—those days, weeks and months on end of constant projects and progress, abruptly coming to an end. They’ve been traded for non-stop nursing, pumping, cuddling and calming. Quite the transition, and I don’t take it for granted, but at the same time I feel disconnected from the world and my old self. It’s tough to scroll through Instagram and see the amazing projects everyone else is working on while ours have been stalled for weeks. It’s hard to stay inspired and motivated to keep going when you’re so exhausted and limited, both physically and with your time.
I get the most fulfillment when I’m bringing my creative vision to life and accomplishing goals, and those are on the back burner right now. I worry I’ll never be highly productive again… Esmé will always need my attention during the day, I can only be gone for so long (without paying for child care). I can’t imagine balancing more than one child—I don’t know how you other mamas do it!
There are a few silver linings on the horizon, though. Tomorrow I have my six week checkup and hopefully I’ll be cleared for exercise, which means I can finally get out of the house for mommy & me workouts. I am so looking forward to being active again, stepping outside and socializing with other new moms. I know it will be invaluable for my mental health and overall wellbeing.
The other hope I’m holding onto is the fact that 6-8 weeks seem to generally be the most difficult peak for newborns (as far as crying, sleeping, digestive issues, etc) and that her sweet little personality will continue to develop. There’s nothing better than newborn coos and ear to ear grins—they’re what keep me going all day!
So that’s where I’m at, nearly six weeks into this motherhood journey. More difficult than I anticipated, but I love this baby more than life itself and I know we’ll eventually find our rhythm. And it helps to know I’m not in this alone—I feel such a connection to all of you other mamas!
PS—our photographer captured the sweetest little video for our girl. You can watch it here 🙂
More to come…
Mary says
I’m going to chime in and echo what everyone else is saying. Patience and you will get used to this new life Jenna. It is a learning curve for sure. And I would dare to say that after the second baby, things do get easier. Sending you lots of love!!
Vanessa says
I would say put all of those projects on hold, but I know that in addition to them being an important part of your high achieving identity, they are also related to your financial life and that’s pretty important. But go as slowly as possible, as much as you can afford because if you push too hard right now, you’ll end up sick and be in a more difficult spot to recover from.
By the way, the watery blue tile is lovely!
Lindsay says
Hi Jenna! You are going through what all moms go through so don’t worry! It can be frustrating to not have the time to accomplish even small projects that make you feel productive (and this is super important to your mental health!) so as a now seasoned homeschooling mom of a 4 year old and 1 year old as well as a super driven, creative, productivity loving person, I would suggest looking for other women in your community that you could trade services for babysitting. Maybe you could offer design services to them or help them beautiful their homes in exchange for coming over and watching Esme’ while you work. I think this is a super important thing to do because your frustration with not accomplishing projects will cause you to get even more frustrated that you are not fully enjoying these fleeting moments with your baby to the fullest. This is my suggestion as I’ve been there 🙂 Also set aside some time for your hubby too, like once a week, so you don’t get frustrated that things aren’t the same with him either 😉 The most important thing is to have patience and know that you are going through the exact same thing as everyone else in your position :). Strategically plan and you will be satisfied on all fronts 🙂 Also, one last thing: reduce your “to do” list to one thing a day and be OK with that until she is 2 🙂
Abigail R. Jacob says
Those newborn weeks are so hard!! Esme is the cutest little sweetie but it’s a real challenge, no doubt.
I would encourage you not to completely write off child care in the future. The vast majority of those amazing bloggers you see employ either part-time or full-time childcare behind the scenes, and some of them admit to it. (I know that both Emily Henderson and Chris Loves Julia have a full-time nanny.) It’s just not possible to fit everything in otherwise. I work in a fairly traditional outside-the-home job, and I’ve never regretted sending my daughter to daycare. Make your time at home with your child count, and know that work is often part of making the best life for your family. Not just monetarily, but professionally, mentally and emotionally for you.
Too much of America is invested in WAAAAAY too much mommy guilt. Working moms are lambasted for spending too much time at the office and SAHMs are lambasted for not being productive enough. I SAY CUT THAT OUT.
You do what works for your child and your family. If that includes childcare and full-time work, you do it! If that involves some cutting back of your overall productivity in favor of the best arrangement for your child, do it! And don’t let yourself feel guilty.
Pam says
I think you will love the BM Advance paint. I’ve used it on two kitchens, numerous vanities, and miles of crown molding, baseboards and doors. I’ve rolled it, brushed it and sprayed it, and it always comes out looking great. The only tricky thing about applying it, is learning not to brush it back and forth if you have to brush it on. I used it in a rental home five years ago that’s occupied by a single Dad, and three young children that are very rambunctious, and it has held up beautifully.
And on the Mama front…….don’t be hard on yourself. You’re productivity has just taken a temporary detour. You’re producing literally everything your beautiful daughter needs and doing it 24/7. As a mother of three grown men and grandmother of nine, I promise it will get easier.
Julie says
OMG I am in love with all the awesome quirky details in this house like the swan faucets!! It is going to be incredible when it is done! I am also in love with how supportive mamas are in this online community – I had my first daughter almost 18 years ago and the seismic shift I experienced left me with Post Natal Depression (which still carried a stigma back then). I am absolutely positive that had this type of open and supportive online community existed back then I would have found my footing so much faster! I wholeheartedly agree with all the previous commenters to be gentle with yourself and you WILL find your groove 🙂 I went on to have two more daughters and I had to laugh at your comment about having multiple kids to look after – when my third was a baby I used to wonder what the heck I did with all my “spare” time when I only had one ROFL.
Mindi says
I have been in your shoes as far as the baby and it was SO HARD. I felt like an entirely different version of myself and so exhausted it would make me nauseous. For me it got easier at 3 months, 6 months and so on. I also went on medication for a short while because I felt like I constantly had a gray cloud over my head which I had never felt before on my life. PPD is real. Both my kids were the fussy, up all night, digestive issue having, hard to soothe types off babies. Our pediatrician assured me a fussy baby does not equal a fussy toddler or kid and he was so right. Now they are DREAM kids in every way. Focus on getting through each day. Carve out some tiny pockets of time for yourself. A small break works wonders. Wishing you the best.
Lauren says
I promise it will get easier, and you will find your way back to some version of your old self. Mom friends are invaluable and are what got me through some of the hardest times! The sheer fact of knowing you aren’t alone always helped me feel better. It took you 9months to create that little angel so give yourself at least that amount to heal mentally and physically. I have been following you since your first Florida home and it’s been so fun to watch your journey, good luck mama I am sending you some sleep vibes!
Patti says
As they say, the days are long but the years are short! This too shall pass. Meanwhile, we need to know the name of that lippy! ?
Sandi says
Loved your post, both parts!
As Esme grows through her difficult period, so will you with all your hormone flucuations. It is hard to see things clearly and it all looks daunting when you are tired and feel overwhelmed. It will change and you will get used to a new normal with all the gifts of motherhood attached. Be gentle with yourself and don’t worry if the house is always picked up!
Jessica says
I appreciate how honest you are about missing your old self. I definitely felt this, more with my second than my first for some reason, but was afraid to say it aloud to somebody because babies are supposed to be so great and wonderful (which they are!). I’m glad I’m not the only one feeling this way! Wish I could have read this about 12 weeks ago! There is SO much truth in the saying “the days are long (so long sometimes), but the years are short.” Keep up the great work momma. We’ll get back to ourselves in no time!
Kami says
Don’t worry! It will get better! I have 4 kids (10,8,4,and 2) and I work full time and flip houses. During the first 6 weeks of my first child I never would have been able to do what I’m doing. It’s a completely new experience that no one can prepare you for no matter how much someone talks to you about it or how much you read about it. You will never be who you were but soon you will look back and realize you wouldn’t ever want to go back to being that person. I have all girls and each one of them coming into our lives has changed us and our dynamic but it just keeps getting better. My girls even help me stage houses and do projects now! It’s so fun! ?
Kristen Eff says
I know every mother has a unique experience but this post really resonated with me. As a mom of a 4 year old, I can say with confidence that the zombie/survival stage was limited to my first year and then it’s so much easier and fun. Don’t try to do everything yourself and it’s okay to ask for help, even if you’re a type “A” DIY’er personality. 😉 One simply cannot thrive on mere hours of sleep. I cannot imagine more than one kid either. That’s why our family is now complete and life is full and good. Try not to worry about what the future will bring. Things evolve and solutions are discovered. Sending out light and love to all the fellow mamas out there.
Beth says
Your projects turn out beautifully as always! I would argue that being a mom will make you even more productive as you go forward. I wouldn’t have understood that before I had kids, but now that mine are 6 and 3 I’ve learned that no one hustles harder than a mom. No one gets more done, is more efficient, or tougher than a mom. I look at my mom friends and am blown away by what they do – I’d hire a mom to do any job! So you may not be as productive with work as you’re used to, but I know for sure that this will only make you stronger! Hugs!
Jenny says
You are not alone. I had the same thoughts and feelings; I think all new moms do. I remember describing it as being hit by a truck – not physically, but mentally. Motherhood is a whole new identity, and it takes time to incorporate it into your other identities as a woman, wife, entrepreneur, etc. Carving out little bits of time alone, even though it’s hard to be away from your darling daughter, will help to rediscover yourself and make it easier to absorb the motherhood identity. Hang it there – it really does get better and better. And congratulations!